Sonic Rantfiction: The New Generation
by MysteriousManPerson
Summary: This is the entire new series of Sonic Rantfiction, the only fanfiction that isn't a fanfiction! Well, to be more accurate, it's a fanfiction of a fanfiction...it's basically the Momento of fanfiction, and I'm Christopher Nolan. Anyways, read along as I hate on millions of fanfiction tropes, from FC's to OOC's! Continue of you dare...ooooooo...
1. Episode 1 - Update

**is a place of evil and corruptness. Only one man must rise from the shadows to defend the world...That's right, MysteriousManPerson is back. After a long hiatus, I'm ready to challenge Sonic fanfiction authors again and teach them on what is good writing and what is bad writing. Before we begin, though, here's some anti-climactic updates! Yay!**

First of all, I'd like to announce that, by public demand, I am no longer writing separate "stories." All of the onward episodes (including both normal episodes and response editorials) will be one continuous story. Hooray! Justice for all! The reason for this is because after the "Space Travesty," (See what I did there?) I was so f*cking stressed by what had happened that I needed a hiatus. Part of this was all the multiple stories. But that will be no more! This is my gift to you! This is my celebration!

Second, the way these stories are written will be different. I would like to give you a rundown why in the form of this wonderful list:

1\. The already mentioned single-document change.

2\. Response editorials will be put into normal episodes. We will start with the normal episode, then continue on into the Responses.

3\. Polls are stressful. I know I haven't had them for that long, but they limit my creativity.

Third and lastly, I would like to apologize to all of you for not announcing a hiatus. I wish I did. If I knew it would take three weeks for me to return, I would have told you. I am very sorry, and I hope you all can forgive me because I love you guys. :)

 **Since I consider this update to be a full episode (or it could be that I'm just lazy today), we're going to cover some responses.**

 _Metal1784 says, "_ _A lot of young tween types make those 'edgehogs' as you call them, and that's just their way of being creative and expressing themselves. They don't mean any harm in making those characters. Yes, you have higher standards when it comes to FCs, but those characters are not doing you any real harm except perhaps giving you an eyesore :P Plus, our community will never get "bad" fan characters stopped, especially since we all have different standards. Live and let live."_

So, you're saying that Josh Trank's new Fant4stic movie was just his way of expressing himself? You know what, this is my new favorite review. I love this one. I'm hanging it up on my wall now.

 _Christian Wolf27 says, "_ _I totally think that Ness is a really stupid character to be made of in the first place."_

I like Earthbound, though... :'(

 _UnknownVoix says, "_ _I happen to be a Sonamy fan (but not those rabid kinds who'd actually start fundraisers to eliminate Sally from the franchise or to make an hour long movie of romance smut starring Sonamy, not that I've ever heard of any) and I was appalled to a minimal degree since I'm so used to hearing and reading tons of insulting BS caked on Sonic shippings. I know that fanfiction is all about imagination and that it's all up to the creators or something but for the love of all that is good and holy, they should at least think about what the frigging hell they're writing and let someone they know and love (or seriously just anyone) read what they're about to post online."_

Why aren't we friends already?

 _UnknownVoix continues_ _, "..._ _it's fine if that somoene ships a certain couple, It's also fine if they make stories and artwork about this certain couple. It's NOT fine to kill two chipmunks, harrass other people just because their opinion doesn't go with yours (whoever that mad shipper may be), destroy people's lives (lots of that crap on DeviantArt), make artwork of you laughing at the opposite side and killing Amy with using Shadow or Sonic or even both(or whoever). It's not fine to lash out at people just because they say that they're [insert opposing ship here]. Seriously, just because your identity is masked by whatever screen name doesn't mean you have the right to harass the other shippers of another ship."_

Totally. There are multiple people who have been cyberbullied because of a different opinion about romance, which is freaking stupid. I've seen more intelligence in a Happy Madison picture than whatever word spews out of a butthurt [insert sanic ship here] fan. Seriously, we should be friends.

 **I still haven't gotten a review saying, "If you like hating on Sonic fanfiction, why don't you write one?!11!?1" Come on, butthurt fanboys/fangirls! Why hasn't that happened yet? I'm ashamed of you. Well, that's all for tonight, my wonderful friends! Don't forget to review and flame!**


	2. Episode 2 - Out of Style

**So, when I made that comment about Fant4stic in my last episode, that was right before I actually saw the movie. After officially seeing it, I have to say that it's much, much worse than I thought it would be. In fact, Fant4stic is the first movie I've ever seen that's just as bad, if not worse, than a majority of the bad Sonic fanfiction I have read.**

I've already talked about how mind-numbingly stupid it is to turn an official Sonic character into a self-insert. Today, I talk about the reverse effect: making a character out-of-character for plot convenience. Now, let me get something straight: no one is Sega, and no one is perfect. I'm not even sure I could make a perfect Sonic fanfiction. No story is without sin. However, that does not excuse not trying.

Like I said in my old Sonic couples episode, there are characters portrayed out-of-character for the sake of having the author's favorite couple fall in love with each other. For example, Sally may be portrayed as a sociopath slut and Amy may be portrayed as Jesus Christ with boobs. Or, Sonic may be portrayed as a closet bisexual who cries more than Frodo Baggins and Shadow may be portrayed as a handsome and strong closet homosexual. This may sound like I'm over exaggerating, but I'm not. I have literally read a fanfiction where Sally beats up Amy with a lead pipe, and I read twenty where Sonic cries and Shadow comes along to stick his...you know how it goes.

Now, it's not always Sonic couples that do this, but it is the most popular and is where the majority of this problem lies. Here's the issue: making a character out-of-character ruins the character. It also leads to blandness. I should not be here right now saying that Sonic fanfiction shouldn't portray Sonic as the perfect man or Amy as the perfect girl. Sonic isn't perfect. Sonic is a teenager. Sonic is sarcastic and cocky, but he will still help those in need. Amy isn't perfect. Amy is obsessive and has anger issues. Before someone tells me that Sonic can be written however the author wants, let me ask you this: wouldn't you like to see a character overcome his problems rather than a character who doesn't have any?

 **Wait, what do you mean Fox is still committed to Fant4stic?! They want to make a sequel to this bomb? Why?! O-oh, sorry. Just...um, checking the news. On to the Response Editorial!**

 _Christian Wolf27 says,_ _"_ _I just want you to know is that i'm not saying that Earthbound is a bad game which it isn't Ness is just a poorly made character that sounds way to girly. "If you like hating on Sonic fan fiction, why don't you write one & see that they are not as horrible as you think they are." I think that polls are a major waste of time & utterly crap to begin with & BTW whose bright idea was it to come up with polls in the first place? Peace Out from your HOWLING! #1 fan Christian Wolf 27"_

Aw, shux. Thanks, Christian Wolf! Honestly, I think Ness should sound like a girl because every little boy sounds like a girl. I mean, Tails sounds like a girl, and everyone likes him. Actually, Tails IS voiced by a girl, so...yeah. Oh, and I was the one with the "bright idea" to come up with the polls. And I regret everything. Also, dang it! Looks like I have to write a Sonic fanfiction. You're killing me, Howling #1 Fan Christian Wolf 27! ;)

 _Spearhead Prime says, "_ _Finally, you're back. Now, the inquisition against the lemon empire will begin. For me, i've rarely done romance because of lemons or the typical anti-Sally content. For me, i'm a U.S Spec-Ops fan. I write about military, no one takes those seriously. This is up to a point that lemon authors are needed to be swatted. How long this will stand?"_

Yes...good...The Lemon Empire will fall and good stories will rise...Muahahahahahaha! On a serious note for just one second, however, I would like to clarify that romance itself isn't bad. It's the OOC and lemons that make it bad. Now, back to evil laughter. Muahahahahaha!

 **Have you guys ever noticed that Fant4stic and Sonic Boom are actually the same thing? Think about it. Don't forget to review and flame!**


End file.
